“There is no denying that a dementia diagnosis, for yourself or your partner, is a devastating thing and many things can feel as if they’re ended or curtailed.
“However, life goes on and for some opportunities open up. In 2017, when Rosemary had to give up her teaching job, we decided to make the most of the new opportunities, for us, of holidays during “term time”. Over the next few years, we enjoyed trips to France, Denmark, Norway and many parts of the UK.
“Then, in 2019 we had to cut short a trip to Harris and cancel a Switzerland trip three days before departure. Rosemary was so disorientated away from the home environment and my stress levels rose so high that holidays no longer seemed to be an option. Over the following years we became “home birds” and even overnights to visit family became a thing of the past. If we couldn’t visit and return home in a day then we couldn’t make the trip.
“Years passed and then a family member’s illness meant that we had no option but to stay away on an extended visit, by their hospital bedside. We booked into a hotel and I expected a disturbed night with rising anxiety levels. Well, the truth is I didn’t sleep much, as I awaited Rosemary’s distress to kick in. But Rosemary slept happily and by the time we returned home, a few days later, I realised maybe travel was in fact an option again.
“We stuck our toe in the “holiday market”, tried a couple of long weekends and based on their success we booked a week away in Harris, in May this year. After all. if it all got stressful, we could just come home. We both had a great time, enjoying the peace and quiet and the beauty of a Scottish island.
“Based on that experience I decided to book a river cruise to celebrate our 40th wedding anniversary, after all that’s the sort of thing “normal” couples do. So off we set to enjoy a Riviera River Cruise (many other companies are available) up the Rhine for eight days. How bad could it be?
“Well truth is we enjoyed eight days of bliss, being waited on from start to finish, with excellent catering, superb accommodation and nothing but support from crew and other passengers alike. Rosemary uses a wheelchair, when we’re out and about, and each time we got on and off the ship we were inundated with offers of help to carry chair, bags and probably ourselves, if that had been required.
“Rosemary ended up with 150 “volunteer carers” and on day one was “adopted” by a young waitress, who ensured that for every meal “lady Rosemary” sat at her table and received nothing but support to make the dining experience as easy as possible (Rosemary requires to be fed all her meals). All our travel arrangements, including airport assistance, were covered from leaving home to return and whilst there were hiccups nothing was insurmountable.
“Together we enjoyed visits to landmark buildings, vineyards, lakes and mountaintops. We travelled on cable cars, chair lifts, coaches and trains and even revisited places that we last saw 40 years ago, on honeymoon. In short, we did all the things that “normal couples” do on holiday.
“So, the main thing I’d say is “have dementia can travel!””
Huge thank you to John and Rosemary for sharing their story.
If you’re looking for information on traveling, you can visit our website for helpful tips here.
You can also get in touch with our National Dementia Service by calling 0300 373 5774 or emailing [email protected].